In any business it’s important to schmooze (a.k.a. networking).   There is a lot to like about my town and county I live in, and the endless amount of opportunities to make contacts.   And if you can’t find a group to “exchange cards” with here, one can hop on a train and be in Manhattan and start shaking hands.

Seminars – when run well, will have interesting talent and be a wealth of knowledge.  But lately all they seem to be is a bunch of narcissistic people selling themselves in very chaotic, uninviting environments.

So my latest experience attending a breakfast to network with “working Moms” in Manhattan didn’t really surprise me when the event fell apart as soon as I got off the elevator at this upscale department store.  Simply put, it was a waste of my time and a bunch of BS to boot!  I traveled to the City to listen to an unorganized panel of successful Moms, talk about their experience being working Mothers and how to obtain balance.  Hell, we’ve all heard the stories, is there anyone that has a different one?  I mean reeeaaally different.  Oprah had a talk show for over 20 years and she pretty much covered it all.  You work; then decided to have kids.  So now you work and have kids.  You sleep less, worry more.  Yup that’s about it.  Listen, after the first ½ hour when your audience starts to converse among themselves on other topics and actually start to walk out, the seminar is a bust!  And the moderator bringing her toddler up on stage, although adorable, unfortunately is not the life jacket this event needed.

One question did intrigue me.  The moderator asked her panel of successful Moms, “When was your “Ah ha” moment?”  And as if she hit the “slow mo” button, the Stepford wives gazed at each other with a look of bewilderment in their eyes, each took a deep breath and proceeded to take more time than one needed to come up with their recollection of, when it was, or if they actually had one, or if they will ever experience one.  And then the successful Moms all giggled in unison!  OMG!!  What?!!  Funny, right then and there, I had my “Ah Ha” moment.  But it was more like an “Uh Oh” moment!  Because this group took me for $100 bucks which bought me a cup of coffee and a swag bag consisting of pamphlets on more “networking” events, a hair clip a drag queen would reject and a “free hot facial shave” Yes, a hot facial shave!!   At a women’s networking event!  I ended up giving the bag to a guy on the subway and he wasn’t even sure he wanted it!   This event clearly needed liquor.  And that’s my time!

P.S.:  Hey Mommy networking event?  You owe me one morning of sleep and 34 greenbacks for my round trip ticket on Metro North!

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